


Words Never Spoken

by youwantfryeswiththat



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alcohol, Angst, Assassin's Creed: Syndicate, F/M, Feels, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Jealousy, Love, Original Character(s), Past Relationship(s), Physical Abuse, Post-Break Up, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-24
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-01-25 16:41:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18578443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youwantfryeswiththat/pseuds/youwantfryeswiththat
Summary: Jacob and you deal with the aftermath of your recent breakup in very different ways. Jacob, using alcohol to try and escape his thoughts of you, can't stop questioning why you left him for another man...that is, until you show up in his carriage late one night, eyes drenched with tears and covered in bruises you had attempted to conceal.





	1. Hangover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first ever fanfiction, so my apologies for any rookie mistakes. I'm still adapting my writing style :)
> 
> Major feels lie ahead...

###### Jacob’s POV

_Ugh._

As Jacob slowly opened his eyes, the sounds of the train moving along the tracks and the bright light from the sun shining through the nearby window made him wince in pain. Feeling this horrible in the morning had become a regular occurrence ever since he and Y/N had gone their separate ways just over a fortnight ago. He had thought that the drink would make him forget about her and her beauty, but he was sorely mistaken…if anything, getting drunk every night had made him think of her more.

“Jacob, love, drink some of this…Jacob?”

He looked up to meet the vibrant green eyes of his most recent pursuit, who was reaching out with a large glass of water. Maeve was unquestionably attractive, with long red hair and freckles and her thick Irish accent…but she wasn’t Y/N. She was beautiful, treated him well and was incredibly patient with him after his nightly escapades, but he simply couldn’t push away the thoughts of Y/N when they were intimate with one another. He had even secretly used a small photograph of Y/N that he kept under the lamp next to the bed to help him finish himself after they had sex yesterday – Maeve was talented in bed, but she didn’t know what he liked, no – what he _**needed**_ \- the way that Y/N did. 

“Thank you, Maeve.” Jacob murmured quietly, reaching out to grab the glass of water, taking a small sip as he gently glanced over her features as she sauntered towards the window to draw the curtains. 

“Evie’s just outside Jacob…she’s really worried about you.”

Jacob could sense the disappointment in Maeve’s voice. _She deserves better than this,_ he thought to himself… _she deserves better than me, like Y/N deserved better than me…surely that’s why she left me for **him**?_ Just thinking about Y/N with him made a sharp pain shoot through Jacob’s chest. _Did she love him? Did he make love to her and bring her pleasure like I had? Did he truly make her happy?_

“I’ll let you two have a moment then, okay? I’ll be in the next coach reading my book if you need me.”

Maeve smiled to him, planting a small kiss on his left cheek before she strolled over to the door. He could hear her and his sister quietly speaking in the doorway but couldn’t make out what they were saying. _Nothing positive, I’m sure,_ he thought to himself as he spotted the firm look on Evie’s face as she marched towards him just moments later. 

“Jacob Frye, you absolute pillock – I’m so tired of your shit! We have work to do, but no! - Instead, you’ve decided, yet again, that the pub was _**far**_ more important…what’s gotten into you lately?!?”

Her voice echoed loudly in his head, causing him to wince once more. 

“Evie, please- “

“Fuck off Jacob.” She hissed angrily. “Do you _**really**_ think this is what Y/N would want you to be doing? Knocking back drink after drink until you are inebriated? It’s _**pathetic**_. Father would-”

“ **DON’T BRING FATHER INTO THIS!** ” He snapped at her, immediately regretting his harsh and unforgiving tone as the throbbing pain in his forehead re-emerged. Evie, as usual, was right- Y/N had never liked it much when he stumbled through the door after having a few too many with the Rooks. She wouldn’t say anything, of course- it wasn’t in her nature. But he could sense it in her body language and the way she spoke: Y/N cared deeply for him and didn’t want to see anything happen to him. _But if she cared so much, why, oh why, did she leave me for **him**?_ He simply couldn’t understand it. 

“I’m sorry for snapping, Evie…really.” He said, slowly sitting up so he could shift to the edge of the bed, finally coming face-to-face with his sister, who was sitting in a chair placed immediately beside the bed. The look on her face immediately shifted from that of irritation to one of concern and a hint of sympathy. “It’s just been so difficult to deal with her leaving…I thought we were happy- I don’t understand why any of this happened…and why _**him**_?”

“I don’t know Jacob…” Evie mumbled, gently grabbing his hands to comfort him. “I wish I did; she was my friend too. I know things are hard for you right now and I know the love you feel for her only makes all this that much harder, but please, please think of poor Maeve- you’re really putting the girl through hell.”

Evie wasn’t telling him anything that he didn’t already know. He had met Maeve at the pub just three days after the split – desperately craving intimacy, he brought her back to the train that night. He had planned to let her down easy the next morning, writing her a short note before sneaking off quietly, but after finding her cuddled close against his side as they woke up, he couldn’t bear the thought of losing that _**closeness**_. Admittedly, it had filled a portion, however minute, of the seemingly gigantic void Y/N had left. _Surely if Y/N could move on so fast, I could too…_ except he didn’t. And he wouldn’t, at least not now, and certainly not with Maeve.

Night after night, no matter how much he drank, Y/N still crept her way into his dreams. Her glistening E/C eyes, her long H/C hair that gently swept over her soft skin…the way her breasts felt as his lips trailed between her nipples, and the way she mewed in pleasure when they made love. He simply couldn’t get her out of his head. 

“Can you do that for me, Jacob?...Jacob?” 

The sound of Evie’s voice snapped him back to reality. He hadn’t even realised his sister had been talking to him, and he was struggling to recall when exactly she had released his hands and made her way to the doorway. 

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Get some rest, Jacob. And please, consider staying here tonight. If not for Maeve, or for yourself, do it for me.” 

The concerned look on his sister’s face made him falter; it was just now occurring to him how much his behaviour was hurting Evie.

“I’ve got to go meet Henry now to handle some business, but I’ll be back later tonight with something for supper. Maeve’s left some food on the table for you if you get hungry in the meantime.”

He quickly glanced over to the nearby table, noticing the small tray with some apple slices, chestnuts and bread with a small bowl of what smelled like soup; vegetable soup to be exact. He didn’t even notice it before. _Poor girl,_ he thought to himself; she was being so selfless, trying so hard to care for him, and he was giving her next to nothing in return. 

“Thank you, Evie.”

“I’ll see you later Jacob.” She smiled, “Take care of yourself, okay?”

He forced a smile towards her, trying not to let her see the distress hidden inside him.

“See you…wait, Evie? - Say hi to Greenie for me.” He teased with a smirk.

Rolling her eyes, Jacob watched as his sister jumped off the train onto the platform beside them. Once he was certain that he was alone, he lifted up the lamp, pulling out the photo placed beneath it. 

She was absolutely beautiful. He remembered the day that the photograph was taken as if it was yesterday – the pair had been invited to a ball hosted by the Disraeli’s. Y/N absolutely dreaded the thought of wearing a gown; similar to Evie, she found them infuriating and much preferred her assassin’s robes, trousers and boots. Still, the deep burgundy dress framed her body perfectly, accentuating the curves of her body in the most perfect way. The gown was cut low, but in a way that managed to preserve her modesty, with straps that fell off her shoulders. Her hair was pulled back into a braided updo and she was wearing just enough makeup to highlight her natural beauty. Looking at her standing next to him make his heart drop – _what could this other man give her that he couldn’t?_ She looked so happy in the picture, her eyes sparkling as he held her close to him… _what had changed?_

He took one last glance at the photo before replacing it at its home beneath the lamp’s base. He was lucky nobody had found his secret hiding spot; if Evie or Maeve found it, there would most certainly be questions. 

As he stood up, Jacob felt his stomach rumble. _I guess I should have something to eat,_ he thought to himself as he approached the table, dragging the chair that Evie had sat in, placing it in front of the tray of food. He spent half an hour nibbling at the bits in front of him, eventually finishing the soup and most of the other snacks. He sat the tray to the side, silently reminding himself to thank Maeve later for preparing the food for him. 

Slipping back into the bed, Jacob struggled once again to push Y/N from his mind as a yawn escaped his lips. Minutes later, as he was gently slipping off into his dreams once more, he was greeted with an image of Y/N’s lips passionately meeting his once more as his tongue explored her mouth and her fingers tangled through his now messy hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had originally planned for this to be a single chapter, but after I got going I decided it would be best split up over a few chapters. 
> 
> Next chapter will be from the reader's POV. 
> 
> Feedback and constructive criticism are always appreciated!


	2. Bets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...And she posts another chapter!
> 
> I decided to take a slightly different approach to write this chapter since the inclusion of a backstory was sort of necessary. 
> 
> Content Warning: there are brief mentions/occurrences of physical abuse in this chapter.

###### Reader’s POV

Y/N ran through the dimly lit streets of Westminster, travelling as far and as fast her legs could possibly take her. _This bloody dress,_ she thought to herself, cursing the fact that she had to wear the infernal contraption as it was slowing her down terribly. She wasn’t sure if any fault in being caught could be attributed to poor execution, or if it was all a complete coincidence…but regardless of the circumstances, her well-thought-out plan had ultimately failed. She had wandered into his office in search of the latest correspondence she was tasked with retrieving, working under the assumption that he wouldn’t be home for another hour. A mistake; she later came to realise, as the man came storming through the doors of the office far earlier than expected, a look of seething anger upon his face unlike anything she had ever seen before.

###### 

“What the hell do you think you are doing?!”

She froze, immediately dropping all of the papers in her hands, including the stack of letters. Unsure as to whether or not her cover was blown and not wanting to raise further suspicion, she decided to play innocent.

“Love, I’m sorry, I was writing a letter to a friend and ran out of stationery, and I know you had requested that I stay in today, so-"

“So, you went snooping through my private documents?”

A lump formed in her throat, her nerves almost getting the best of her before she was able to muster all of her remaining courage in order to speak.

“I wasn’t looking at what is written…I promise. I didn’t know where the letter paper was, and I was trying to-"

“You were trying to retrieve the letters sitting beneath that pretty little hand of yours? The same letters that a certain group of assassins are searching for….or is their presence beneath your hand a complete coincidence, hmm?”

_Shit,_ she thought to herself, still struggling to maintain her composure, her breath picking up pace. _He knows._

“Assassins?” she murmured, still feigning innocence, “Sir, I have no clue about any assassins or their interest in these letters…I saw the paper and picked it up with the belief that it was unused, but I was mistaken. I’m very sorry.”

He looked up at her, analysing her and her words for any evidence to form a semblance of doubt. He slowly moved closer to where she was standing, his posture loosened, and he unclenched his fists – it appeared as if he had believed her fabrications. 

“Hmm, I see then…most curious,” He spoke, gazing directly into her eyes. She met his stare momentarily before looking down to her feet whilst twiddling her fingers against her thigh. The man reached for her face, gently stroking her left cheek before swiftly striking her with an open palm. 

“Still, I cannot let this misconduct go unpunished…”

###### 

When Y/N was confident that she was no longer being followed by the man, she stopped at a bench near the entrance to St. James’s Park, immediately bursting into tears. She was mentally and physically exhausted, and she desperately longed for Jacob to hold her and reassure her that everything would be okay. 

_He’d think me stupid,_ she thought to herself, running her hand over the bruises beginning to discolour her arms as she sobbed. Not only did she fail at retrieving the letters, but she let this man lay his hands on her with absolutely no form of retaliation on her part, barring her retreat from the house afterwards. If Jacob had been there, he would have beat the man until he couldn’t move for daring to lay a hand on her…after all, he was always so protective over her. _But he’s not here, because you left him. You left the man you loved, all for the sodding mission…_

She had always echoed the twin’s father’s sentiments – to never let personal feelings compromise the mission. So, naturally, when the council requested that she aid in the retrieval of documents from the home of a recently-discovered Templar asset, who was threatening the newly-found stability in London following Starrick’s death, she had known exactly what they expected from her…and she knew that Jacob would never allow her to do the mission while they were together. He would have judged it to be far too dangerous and would have never let her take such risks. Now, of course, she was beginning to doubt Ethan’s thoughts on the matter. _He didn’t have to walk away from the person he loved, now did he?_

Jacob and Y/N had got on from the moment they met; the council had felt that the twins and Henry could use some assistance in maintaining the Assassin’s hold over London, so they decided to send Y/N and two recruits to help out. Jacob had lusted after Y/N for many months, the flirtatious banter, glances and touches finally culminating in their first kiss nearly six months ago. Unsurprisingly, Evie had uncovered their feelings for one another weeks before either of them had the courage to admit it to each other; Jacob wasn’t exactly subtle in expressing his attraction towards her, making it easy for Evie to read right through him. However, breaking Y/N down had proven more difficult for her, so the eldest twin was elated when she finally coerced Y/N to admit that her brother’s feelings were reciprocated. Evie was worried that her brother would end up with a woman she found completely unbearable, yet this fear quickly dissipated after confirming her suspicions. Y/N and Evie had grown quite close since the former had arrived in London; the two shared many common interests and approached their missions in a similar way, both preferring stealth and careful planning to Jacob’s more reckless and impetuous approach.

_God, I miss them._

As to be expected, Jacob was absolutely devastated when Y/N told him she was leaving him for another man. It was the most difficult thing she had ever done in her entire life…deserting the love of her life and her best friend to ensure the mission’s success. Still, she somehow managed to make it through the disheartening conversation with Jacob, barely making it out of earshot before she allowed her tears to fall. Of course, in everything she had done, she had never been unfaithful – she could never do such a thing to him. Y/N did just enough to wrap the asset around her finger, waiting until she had ended things with Jacob to take things that necessary step further. 

_It’s all buggered now anyways._

Sure, the man hadn’t learnt her true allegiances; at least, she didn’t have reason to believe that he had. But could she really go back there? Back to the man who, without a second thought, could lay his hands on her for simply entering his office? She wouldn’t be able to defend herself against him without her cover being exposed; even if she could, she had explicit instructions from the council that no harm was to come to the man until all of the documents were obtained and safely in their possession. That left her with very few options. _And he will surely be angry that I ran off…_

As she sat on the bench, glancing towards the trees settled opposite of where she had entered, she couldn’t help but smile as she reminisced about the time she and Jacob had their first date at this very park.

###### 

Jacob, cocky as ever, had believed that he could make it to the top of Big Ben before she could. The two made a bet: if she got to the top first, Jacob had to give her his top hat for an entire week. If he triumphed, Y/N had to go with him on a date of his choice. Y/N would never admit it to him, but she purposely let him win that day. Although Jacob probably would have won of his own accord anyways, she couldn’t help but be curious as to what ideas the light-hearted and alluring man could possibly come up with for a date. 

She was pleasantly surprised when he picked her up a few days later, flowers in hand, and told her that they would be going for a picnic at the park. He had packed and prepared all of the food for the picnic himself and had scoped out the perfect spot for them to sit ahead of time. She honestly hadn’t expected this much effort from him; if anything, she had expected to be forced out to the pub for drinks one night and that he would later try to call it a ‘date’. The two ended up sitting and talking for hours, taking in the stunning scenery around them. As dusk, as they started packing up to head back to the train, Y/N grew bold and once again dared him to race her to the top of Big Ben: if she won, he owed her another date – this time wherever she wanted. Jacob, the cheeky sod, claimed that she owed him a kiss if he won. Y/N barely beat Jacob this time around, reaching the top of Big Ben just seconds before him. 

“Well, well Jacob, it looks like you owe me another date! Hmm, where do I want to go?” She smirked, tapping her chin as if she was deep in thought. 

“Oi, cheater!” He whined, pouting. “Let’s give it another go?”

She laughed, shaking her head as she walked over to where he was standing. “Nope, Jacob,” she said, gently poking the tip of his nose, “you owe me….dinner! And don’t you dare try and bring me to the pub. I want a proper meal.”

“I would never!” he quipped, hand over his mouth in mock surprise. “Thinking so low of me…you wound me, love.”

A giggle escaped her lips as she reached out for his hand, gently grasping it as she pulled him closer to her. 

“Still, you made a solid effort, Jacob, and I think that deserves a reward…”

Without a second thought, she leaned towards him, planting a small kiss on his right cheek. She spotted his cheeks going red as he looked up to meet her gaze with a wide grin on his face.

“Seems I didn’t need to win after all.”

“Don’t get cocky Jacob.” She muttered, releasing his hand as she approached the edge of the building. “I’ll be ready tomorrow at six. Don’t be late.”

He watched as she jumped off, landing gracefully in the haystack below. She smiled up at him, waving before she ran off towards the train, picnic basket in tow.

###### 

_That’s the day I fell for him,_ she thought to herself as she let a sigh escape her lips. _I had wanted to kiss him from the moment I opened that door…_

But that feeling could never match her desire for him at this very moment; the longing for his lips on hers, to have him wrap his arms around her and hold her and protect her…

“Oh, sod the mission!” she shouted, quickly jumping up from the bench, sprinting out of the park and towards the nearby gang hideout where she knew she could find some of Jacob’s Rooks. 

“Miss Y/N…is that you?” she looked up, immediately recognising the voice as James, a Rook she had grown close with during some of her missions with the twins. “You a’ight?”

She desperately tried to prevent herself from sobbing, managing to mumble out a ‘no’ before falling to her knees, legs collapsing under her as tears streamed down her face. 

“What’s ‘appened, lass? Do you need me to call ‘or the boss?”

Her eyes quickly shot up to him as she mustered the strength to return to her feet once more, grabbing onto James’ outstretched arm as he offered it to her. _Jacob must not have told the Rooks you two had split up; if he had, surely James wouldn’t be asking you this?_

“Do you know where Jacob is?” she asked, her eyes shooting back and forth between his eyes and her feet as she wiped her tears away.

“Miss Evie dropped by earlier to tell us that the boss ‘ouldn’t be out wit’ us again today. ‘pparently he ‘asn’t taken you leavin’ well at all, ‘e’s been gettin’ legless every night ‘or weeks now”

_Great,_ she thought to herself, _this time, I am responsible for his recklessness._

“I think the boss should be on the train; last I ‘eard, it just ‘eft Waterloo. If you ‘urry you could catch it when it reaches Victoria? I can walk you there if you want?”

“Thank you for the offer, James,” she smiled to him, “but the station’s right around the corner. I’m sure I can manage on my own.”

“You sure, lass?” He asked, grabbing hold of her hand. “’Tis no trouble.”

“Thank you for all of you help, James… but I’ll be fine walking on my own, really.”

“’Aight, Y/N. See you later then, tell the boss I said ‘ello.” He said with a smile, kissing her hand gently before releasing it and quickly turning back to sit with a group of Rooks playing poker nearby. 

She waved to them before turning back to the street, walking briskly towards the station. To her surprise, she managed to reach the platform in just a few minutes.

_What would Jacob do when he saw you? Would he be happy, angry, sad?_ With no idea what to expect, the swarm of emotions in her head increased exponentially as she watched the train hideout approach the platform, getting closer to her with each second that passed.

After some thought, she decided to sneak into Jacob’s bedroom under the assumption that it would be empty; he wouldn’t be asleep yet, and Evie and Henry should have already left for the night. _At least it gives me some time to figure out what the hell I could possibly say to explain all this…_

To her surprise, as she jumped off the platform and snuck through the open door, the door at the other end had just slammed shut. She remained completely still, struggling to formulate an explanation for her presence under the sudden mounting pressure.

“Oi, who’s there?”

She could sense his exhaustion and pain from his voice alone. Still, as he walked closer to her, she realised just how dishevelled he was; his hair an unkempt mess and his eyes puffy and bloodshot. She had never seen him in such a state; usually, he held his drink quite well. _Just how much had he been drinking?_

“Y/N…? Is that you? No, no, it can’t be, I’ve got to be seeing things…”

The confusion in his voice was evident. As she stepped forward into the light of the carriage, she could’ve sworn that her heart skipped a few beats as their eyes met for the first time in weeks.

“Hello Jacob.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was REALLY tempted to keep writing, but then I noticed that the word count was higher than I had expected it to be. So, sadly, I had to resist, however hard it was to do that.
> 
> I hope to have the next chapter up as soon as I can; I've unfortunately got some university deadlines to sort out first :(


End file.
